How a One Week Detox from Social Media was the Best Medicine

A couple of weeks ago, I decided to take a little voluntary break from social media. This wasn't my first time shutting down the social media shop. Two years ago when my anxiety was at a very heightened point, I went dark for about seven months. I had no interest in being on social media, in posting, in following anyone. I wasn't in the right place, mentally, and I had just no desire. It was also quite liberating.  

When I went back on, I made it a point (though there were times I was not successful), to keep the posting and the scrolling to a minimum. It is SO easy to become consumed with likes, with followers, to see what other people are wearing, where they are going, what they're doing. It can become exhausting when there's no moderation. It doesn't even matter if you have bullet-proof self-esteem. At some point, even the most confident people can crack under the social media pressure. It happens. We're human. 

Then there was the time my phone stopped working earlier this year, and while I waited for a new phone, I was off social media again for like three days, and there's always a pattern of withdrawal, call it 'digital heroin.' The term (I can't take credit for it), perfectly describes today's addiction with staying connected and living/sharing our lives on Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, etc. The moment we aren't able to connect, is the minute we go through those withdrawal symptoms, which begs me to constantly ask myself, 'is too much social media bad for our (my) health?'

Part of taking care of me, is becoming aware of what's causing me stress. Being a writer/influencer, social media is par for the course. They're symbiotic so I have to have some sort of presence in the realm. Two years ago, I also deleted Facebook. One social media platform was enough for me. Did it cost me potential followers? Probably, but I didn't care. My sanity was more important. How many times do you catch yourself reaching for your phone? Checking your Instagram? Putting the phone down, and then picking it up 10 seconds later, like if something so monumental and life changing happened in those 10 seconds you locked your phone? You've become addicted and dependent. How many times do you intend to 'stop and smell the roses,' but instead 'stop and film the roses,' opting to capture 'the moment' as opposed to 'living the moment?' I know this happens to me, and I have to remind myself to put the phone down. It's even worse when your six year old reminds you. 

The next step is finding a balance. How do you find the balance of staying connected without being consumed? That's what I've been trying to figure out. I want to be able to be present, but also disconnect so I don't miss out on what's going on around me. It's all about taming that major FOMO thats creeps up on all of us. 

And that's when I decided to detox. 

I made the decision to take a week of from social media. To make sure I wouldn't be tempted to go on Instagram, I deleted the app from my phone. Bye, Felicia! One week of no posting, no stories, no distractions, and not checking to see what other people were doing. As expected, the first couple of days, I would pick up the phone and would instinctively tap on where the Instagram app would be, which was now replaced by my NBC 6 app. It was crazy to see how many times I would pick up the phone to get on Instagram out of habit. 

There are a million other things I could be doing instead of checking my phone every minute, and once the withdrawals subsided, I felt like a weight had been lifted. So what did I do? Well, for starters, I did a lot more of 'Netflix and chill.' Literally. I watched like three different shows I've been wanting to watch, I started reading a new book, and even watched the Royal Wedding without posting on Instagram! I live streamed it and the only memes I saw, were the ones my friends texted me. More importantly, I lived in the moment. It made me realize that sometimes I post too many stories. I love sharing my stories with you because it makes me happy, and I know that you guys love them because you tell me, but maybe it's too many, I thought. It's not letting me fully immerse myself in whatever it is that I'm doing on my own, with my kids, my husband, etc. Even the expression 'everything in moderation,' applies to social media too. 

Oh, I also went back to the gym. I was on a roll, and last month I put it on the back burner, but no more. I got up, got dressed, and went downstairs and got on that treadmill, and I can't believe I'm saying this, it felt GOOD. Another upside. Maybe some of you will read this and say, "well, you can still do all this stuff without having to detox from social media." Yes, you're right. Social Media detoxing is not for everyone, but I know it's good for me, and guess what? I didn't miss anything and the world didn't end because I decided to take a week off. On the contrary, I felt recharged, refreshed, and balanced. 

Maybe all you need is a few days, maybe you want to test the waters and detox for longer than a week, it's all a personal choice. For me, that one week was cathartic and healthy. So much so, that I plan to do it monthly. Once a month, I plan to detox from social media, recalibrate, find my center, and keep reminding myself that there's nothing more 'Instagrammable' than living your best life in the moment. 

Have you ever detoxed from social media? I would love to hear your experience! 

*** These photos were taken at the beautiful Walker Hotel in Greenwich Village. I stayed here one night on my last NYC trip and it was charming, relaxing, and the service was exceptional. It's the perfect place to simultaneously find some good ol' New York energy in a vibrant and soothing environment. Can't you just see how relaxed and carefree I am?! It's not just for show. Definitely check this boutique hotel out next time you're in the Big Apple and really want to get an authentic NYC experience.  Lauren, from @laurelcreative, took these amazing pictures during a beautiful afternoon at the hotel. ***

In Style, 

Kat 

How I Cope With My Anxiety

It's mental health awareness month and I've been very candid with all of you about my struggles with anxiety. I feel that if by sharing my story I can help at least one person, then it's all worth it. Anxiety is not something that goes away overnight. It is something that lives with you but it doesn't need to define you. 

Managing anxiety is not always easy, and it varies by individual. It's important to know that the tools that work for one person to manage and redirect that anxiety, might not work for another and that's okay. It has taken me many years to narrow down what helps me and my anxiety and I want to share them with you. 

There are many factors that trigger my anxiety, and unfortunately, sometimes 'an episode,' as I like to call it, sneaks up on me and can be extremely stressful. It isn't a secret that our move back to Miami and reestablishing ourselves here, has definitely been a challenging one not only as a family, but for myself as well. One of the things I've had to learn the hard way is to take a few steps back, recognize that stress, accept it, and find healthy ways to manage it. Initially, I was in denial;  I was taking on a lot and just kept pushing through, saying 'yes' to everything, wanting to do more than any human could handle, while keeping my head above water. Ultimately, it all came crashing down. 

It was the eye-opening awakening that I needed. My anxiety made sure of that. I won't lie that there is that fear that one of these episodes can happen at any time, and that's why I've worked extra hard at implanting tools and practices that help me manage my anxiety best. Starting with 'me time,' and taking the time to do things that make me happy- like going to the movies, buying fresh flowers, or reading a book. 

Checking in with my mental health is of utmost important to me. The happier and more centered I am the better I can be as a woman, a mother, a wife, and a friend. Conversations about mental health should not be had amongst whispers or behind closed doors. Mental health is something that affects so many of us, and I can't tell you how delighted I am that more and more individuals are opening up about their struggles, no longer ashamed or afraid of the stigma that unfairly comes along with it. There is absolutely no shame in that.

What are some of the things I do to check in with myself and to keep my anxiety at bay? First and foremost, the days of over scheduling and saying yes to every single little thing are done. That was a big one for me. I know that if you watch my Instagram stories it may seem that I have something going on every single day, but I don't. I keep events spread out and they come second to anything that has to do with Coco and the kids, unless of course, they come with me and I can make it a family affair, or I can somehow make it an opportunity for Coco and I to spend time together.

Another crucial factor is detoxing from social media. Social Media is a double edged sword and has often been linked to depression and anxiety, in fact, the term is called 'Instagramxiety' (for real, look it up). Spending too much time scrolling through other people's feeds (which lets keep in mind, are mostly curated), stalking others on Facebook, or just comparing your life to other influencers or keeping track of followers, is exhausting and can take you down a dark rabbit hole. It happens to all of us and it's important to disconnect and/or find a healthy balance in our relationship with social media. Starting today, I'll be taking a one week break- detoxing from Instagram and deleting the app from my phone.

A few months ago, I started going to the gym. It was something I needed to do for myself. No more making excuses or saying that I have 'good genes.' At the end of the day, it's about taking care of our physical and mental health. I was doing pretty good and had a nice routine going, even bought myself some really cute workout outfits. But in the last month, I stopped going altogether, a decision that I haven't been happy about it. So what am I going to do about it? I'm going to kick start my workouts again this week because I know they're good for me in more ways than one. That also includes making more of an effort to eat healthier and to decrease my drinking, which I have significantly (with the exception of one to two times a week). It's important to note, that alcohol only makes anxiety worse. After all, it is a depressant. For those that suffer from anxiety, cutting down alcohol intake is of best interest. In addition, I have shared how during my last episode, I made a choice to go on anti-anxiety medication, which worked tremendously for me (also not good to combine with alcohol). It took me a while to come around to that, because you guessed it, stigma. I'm so happy I did because without the medication and supplementing it with my weekly therapy sessions (sometimes 3-4 times a week at my peak), I wouldn't have been able to function. 

I've saved the best remedy for last, and that's my family. Spending time with my kids and my husband, whether it's watching a movie at home or going to the pool, is sometimes the only medicine I need. Their love and support is monumental and really does help ease my anxiety. 

Anxiety doesn't have to limit you; but it does force you to examine your life and your well-being. Believe it or not, acknowledging anxiety can help us become better versions of ourselves and help us manage our self-care. 

Sometimes difficult roads lead to beautiful situations, and in my case, the future is looking bright. 

In Style, 

Kat